You Know You’ve Just Come Back From Moldova When...

• You find yourself rooting for Russia in the Olympics, although you’re not quite sure why.

• The fact that Americans rarely experience power/water outages continues to amaze you. While you fully appreciate the fact that your town has a modern plumbing system, you keep throwing the toilet paper in the trash instead of the bowl out of habit.

• The microwave seems to be a dubious and perhaps even dangerous appliance.

• Having cereal for breakfast just seems strange. Why have cereal for breakfast when you can have noodles covered in sour cream? (Uh...on second thought, bring on the Cheerios!)

• You’re just so excited to drink beer that actually tastes good. 

• Your body misses walking everywhere, but you realize that you would probably die of heatstroke if you tried to walk to the grocery store.

• It seems like everyone is just eating way too much meat. Where are the vegetables, people? Why aren’t there tomatoes and cucumbers on every table? Is no one aware that it is summer?

• You find yourself worrying about how the Sikh temple shooting will affect America’s reputation abroad. 

• You reflexively check peaches for worms until you remember that American farmers use pesticides. You aren’t sure whether you prefer bugs or pesticides in your peaches.

• It occurs to you that the local news may actually be more inane than state-controlled Russian media. You thank God for NPR, but a small part of you misses listening to GRT (Gagauz Television and Radio).

• You have never fully appreciated how amazing A/C is until now.

• You are dismayed at the fashion victims you see while doing errands. 

• Speaking your native language at stores and restaurants is refreshing. No need to linguistically gear up and put your game face on before every interaction with people in the service profession.

• You feel something is vaguely wrong and then realize you haven’t drunk tea in several days.